Eenie, Meanie, Screenie

It seems ironic that the cell phone, intended to open the world to communication, actually closes down more person-to-person interaction than ever before. It’s a device we all can’t live without, and for good reason, but at the same time, we seem to be cutting off our eye-to-eye contact, which is so important in the development of human connection.

We know and have read about how digital screens, especially cell phones, are inhibiting the necessary brain maturation in young children, as evidenced by poor reading and math scores. It’s a problem. We know.

I was recently at the theater to watch the film Toy Story 5 (which I highly recommend), and there were two kids, probably 7 or 8, scrolling on their cellphones and not watching the movie. A movie about just that problem!

It is convenient to point the finger at this generation and blame the kids for ignoring life while embracing the screen, but I'm not sure the blame is entirely theirs.

Millennials and emerging Gen Z parents were the first to be born into the digital world, and it has become second nature for them to use screens for information, social connections, and more. However, they still had parents who maintained some semblance of normality in their social lives. The problem with their children today is that they see their parents scrolling along and feel that if it’s good for them, it’s good for us. Everybody does it, after all!

These parents aren’t off the hook for misusing digital screens. Recently, a study by the National Bureau of Economic Research notes that since the introduction of cell phones in 2007, US birth rates have declined by 33-52%. Yikes, today's parents aren’t even looking each other in the eyes, and their interactions are weaker! What happened to the 1970’s “Love one another right now.” Well, that’s a discussion for another time…

Back to the problem. Screen devices like cell phones aren't going away, nor should they. We know that children, especially in the first three years of their lives, learn through interaction with people and their surroundings. If their focus is swiping at screens, their eyes and brains aren’t making human connections, and catching up later becomes increasingly hard. The more they look at screens, the more they start to block their brains from learning experiences and communication.

So, what do we do? There are a million studies and ideas being discussed. In the past, I have come back to the same things. Put down the phone and talk to your children. Point things out. Ask questions. Work at it. Don’t expect that this is the way it is. Ask your children one thing every day and have them tell you the answer. Get them to think. Get them to talk. Get them to play.

Oh, and parents, make the call and look at each other!